Respect

I was away from home for the past few days. Just reached my home sweet home yesterday midnight….
Last Friday when I was in the office setting up my laptop and projector in a meeting room for a presentation, Papa-M called to my handphone , I didn’t answer because I left it in my drawer. When I saw his missed calls and returned his phone, he was very angry, gave me a soft scolding somemore, said that I should throw away my handphone because I never answered him. I was a bit angry when he threw his temper on me without any solid reasons, but when he told me that his beloved grandpa “left the world” in the morning, my anger just disappeared….. Papa-M’s grandpa (maternal) passed away peacefully at the age of 89. Since Papa-M was a baby, he was taken care of by his grandpa (and grandma), therefore his relationship with the grandparents is very very close.
We went back to his hometown in the north during the weekend. Because Bb-G was still not feeling well, and the journey could be too long for her, I left Bb-G in nanny’s place. Until todayI have not seen my baby yet, I miss her so much! So does Papa-M….
Papa-M is a northern Hokkien and I am a southern Hainanese. During my trip back for the funeral, one of Papa-M’s uncles asked me one question – does the “process” similar to the “southern style”? I was like hmmmm….and refreshed back my memory 14 years ago to which my grandpa passed away when I just finished my Form 5. There were some similarity in prayers and procedures, only one thing I found was different. During my grandpa ‘s time, the children + spouses, grandchildren + spouses wore different colours of shirts to represent their generation/rank. For eg., my parents and uncles/aunties wore white shirt, then for my generation (the grandchildren) we wore blue. (Green colour represent greatgrandchildren). However during Papa-M’s grandpa’s funeral, all of us wore white shirts. The only way to represent the rank/status was by pinning a small square of colour cloth by the sleeves. For his son, daughters-in-law and daughters, it is light brown colour (string type), sons-in-law – yellow long piece of cloth rolled around the sleeves, paternal grandchildren – brown string cloth + blue cloth , maternal grandchildren – yellow + blue cloth , maternal grandson-in-law – light blue long piece hang across from the shoulder, and I also saw some of them pinning red or green, could be cousin-to-cousin relationships.
Anyway, whatever cultures, whatever procedures, it is the way to deliver the last respect to the deceased.

This photo was taken when Bb-G was around 5-6 months old. One of the best shots taken with Papa-M’s grandpa (Bb-G ‘s greatgrandfather).